It was a hectic day. Homeschool didn’t start until 2 in the afternoon, and everything was just thrown out of balance. Balance is very important to me. It has been a hectic two months since my husband changed shifts at work and I am still trying to piece things together and make everything work. Sometimes he doesn’t get in until 3 a.m. I wait up on him because I just need to know he’s home. The past several days that has been a constant. His shift ends at 11:00 p.m, but his job doesn’t allow time limits, so if he happens to be in the middle of something when his shift is over, like any good worker, he stays until he has finished everything. That is part of why I love him. He won’t stop until it’s finished.
Today however, I thought I hit my breaking point. Even though everything was as calm as it could be, my nerves were shot. Not getting to bed until 3 a.m. every night for over two weeks, has worn me down, especially when my body’s alarm clock wakes me up at six or seven in the morning and doesn’t allow me to go back to sleep. The words I had waited to hear for almost two months came out of my husband’s mouth before he left today. “I should be back on regular shift next week.” My immediate thought, OH HAPPY DAY!!
God knows when I have had enough. He creates things just for me sometimes. I believe that with all my heart. I am called out to my back enclosed patio. My late grandmother’s patio furniture sits on it. It is the most comfortable patio furniture in the world. You cannot find it anywhere anymore. I sit in the trusty rocker she used to hold me and rock me in outside on her deck when I was a young child. We would sit there and she would just tell me to listen. I remember saying as a three or four year old, “But Mamatine (that’s what I called her) I don’t hear anything.” She would reply, “I know, that is how God speaks to us, in silence.”
I am comforted by that, even today, forty years later. I came back to the place where I consider home. I grew up here, not where I lived. The country has always called to me. Tonight it called through the chirping of the crickets and the singing of the katydids in the trees. I heard Mamatine’s voice as I sat in that same rocker, “All nature sings and round me rings the music of the spheres,” (from hymn–This is My Father’s World) and I couldn’t help but smile. The night calmed my spirit as the nocturnal creatures sang. It is nature’s silence. Until we meet again, happy listening.